Words spoken in tribute to Sheila Patricia Kuhl at her funeral mass, 30th of June, 2017, at the church of Our Lady Queen of Apostles, Bishop’s Waltham. Sheila Patricia Kuhl 1919.12.18 (Nuneaton) – 2017.06.11 Tribute offered by her son, Robin.

A few days before my mother’s death, based on the daily reports I was receiving from my sister and brother-in-law, I did feel that my mother was, in fact, passing away and I was reflecting on her life and thinking about this moment, now, when I would be standing before you as I am today, sharing my reflections on her life. So while I was thinking thus about my mother, all of a sudden a jumble of Gospel verses tumbled into my mind. Now this was very strange because my mother was not a person to go around quoting the Bible. Her religion was not a religion of teaching and preaching, but rather one of conduct: how she conducted herself in her daily life. Nevertheless, a cluster of verses tumbled into my mind, one of them echoing today’s reading of the Gospel: Let not you heart be troubled; neither let it be afraid. In the world ye shall have tribulation, but be of good cheer: I have overcome the world.
My mother was known to be a woman of good cheer. She was of a cheerful disposition, and her cheerfulness was rooted in her faith. As I said, her faith could be known through her works. I want to share one particular example which left an indelible mark on my soul. It was when I was about 12 years old. As a young lad of 12 I had a hearty appetite and food was one of the most important things in my life. Consequently I was looking forward to our Christmas dinner. My mother never disappointed when it came to those feast days.
Now my mother knew an elderly lady who was the next door neighbor of our next door neighbor. She knew that this old lady lived alone and had no relatives nearby. Therefore, my parents invited her to share our Christmas table. I didn’t think much of it until we all sat down to dinner. I realized pretty quick that she was going senile and that her eyesight was very poor. So much so, that she spread butter on the tablecloth thinking that she was spreading butter on a piece of bread. But more than that, the fact was, she was smelly, very smelly. So smelly she was, it was putting me off my food. I began to have this internal contention within myself: on the one hand, I really resented my mother for inviting this old lady to spoil MY Christmas dinner; on the other hand, I did realise that perhaps inviting this person to share our table was in accordance with the true meaning of Christmas, that we were supposed to celebrate the birth of Jesus and all that that meant, and we weren’t there to celebrate haute cuisine. So it was like the wheat and the tares contending within myself. Fortunately the good side within me prevailed.
And this was one of the verses that had come into my head. Jesus said that the wheat and tares shallgrow side by side until the day of harvest. I believe that my mother had an intuitive understanding of what this verse means. Good and bad do co-exist in this world of ours. The wheat, which is the good grain, and the tares, which are the weeds, grow side by side within us and among us. In so far as we aspire to be the wheat, our job is to encourage the wheat to grow according to its nature as wheat, and not to allow it to be choked up by the tares.
This leads on to another verse which had popped into my head. Jesus said: Make friends with theMammon of unrighteousness. “Mammon” is a name for money and materialism. Jesus said that we should make friends with the Mammon of unrighteousness. I have always found this to be a very puzzling saying. On another occasion Jesus had said: No man can serve two masters; you cannot worship God and Mammon. And then He says to make friends with Mammon! I believe that, intuitively, my mother was able to give meaning to that saying. If unrighteous materialism is ever to be redeemed, it must be approached in a friendly manner, without unnecessary antagonism. My mother was well able to put her foot down, if necessary; she could get angry, if necessary. But all who have known her know that she never entertained unnecessary antagonism. She would rather approach situations in a friendly way, as a peacemaker. This leads me to the final group of Gospel verses. Where does this kind of faith come from?
St. John tells us that God is love, and he that dwelleth in love, dwelleth in God, and God in him. Herein is our love made perfect, that we may have boldness in the day of judgement, because as He is, so are we, in this world. There is no fear in love, but perfect love casteth out fear, because fear is torment. He that feareth is not made perfect in love. We love God, because He first loved us.
Therefore, Let not you heart be troubled, neither let it be afraid. In the world ye shall have tribulation. My mother knew the tribulation of World War Two. Her only brother was in the RAF and was killed. She herself lived through the blitz in London as a nurse at Highgate Hospital; she was in Bath, Somerset, when Bath was bombed and her parents’ house took a direct hit. Her father was killed and her mother was dug out of the rubble. In the world ye shall have tribulation. But be of good cheer, I have overcome the world.
Sheila Patricia! May your soul, through the mercy of God, rest in peace. May light perpetual shine upon you. And may you live on through us in that spirit of divine cheerfulness.